Absolutely True

Girl Scout officials in Indiana are horrified that 5,000 marijuana plants were found growing on a remote part of the Girl Scout campgrounds. The pot farm was spotted by state troopers in an airplane and shortly afterwards they moved in to bust the growing operation.

Some of the plants were located on an adjacent swampy property that is privately owned, but most of them were secretly growing on the Girl Scout property. Police arrested two adults and a juvenile in connection with the pot plants but the owner of the adjacent property was not involved and knew nothing about it.

Mmmmm.. brownies.

It's that time of year.. blistering heat day after day and 100 degrees in the shade. Here is a warning to everyone to beware of the dangers of the heat and especially try to avoid heat stroke.

On July 16, restaurant workers in Dayton, Ohio experienced a very nasty episode of heat stroke. At 10:20 a.m. they arrived at work and noticed a man who was nude and fondling himself on his front porch.

When police arrived and asked the guy what his issue was, he told them his main problem was that it was so hot out.

HEAT STROKE!

John C. Hibbitts, who says he is a nudist, was arrested for public indecency after police requested that he put some clothes on.

This is Walter, explaining what our naughty kitty cat, Ginger, was doing the other day...

Listen carefully.

Bad, bad Ginger was chewing on a stick while the pool man was here the other day.

In Moscow a con man who said he could raise the dead has been convicted of fraud and put in prison. The man preyed on bereaved loved ones to get money from them and claimed that he could bring back people who were deceased.

Grigory Grabovoy was sentenced to 11 years of hard labor in prison for this scam. In some cases he took money from people after telling them he could cure their dying relatives and in another case he scammed mothers whose children had been killed in a school siege in 2004, promising to bring the children back from the dead. His seminars used to draw hundreds of people who were desperate for help.

But get this - Grabovoy still has supporters who believe in his "powers" and say that he has been unfairly prosecuted. These poor souls still believe he can and will help them bring back loved ones from the dead.

Did you ever see the condom commercials where the men looked like actual pigs? Was this actually a foreshadowing of what's to come?

In Britain, scientist have gotten the green light to create human-pig hybrid embryos.

At least one scientist who is still in touch with reality doesn't think it is a really good idea. The research of stem cells from embryos have not been very productive anyway and the research using stem cells from sources such as cord blood have provided many positive results relating to the treatment, cure and prevention of diseases.

Under British law the man-pig embryos created have to be destroyed after 14 days, but really, who's counting? Many people, myself included, fully believe that if they are able to create a man-pig, they won't destroy it. The curiosity will be too much to handle and someone will secretly grow one - don't you think?

You can read more about this insanity here.

Richard Gwatidzo of Baltimore can thank the screw-ups at FedEx for his recent arrest...or the dumbass in Florida that decided to FedEx him 600 pounds of weed.

After four boxes containing 200 pounds of pot showed up at the wrong address, the person at that wrong address called the cops. The cops then set up a sting operation and posed as FedEx agents and busted Gwatidzo when they pretended to be delivering the other 400 pounds of mary jane.

In Amsterdam, fifteen camels, two zebras and a few llamas and pot-bellied pigs made a daring escape from a traveling circus this week. The animals were all rounded up and accounted for, but the police say that they believe a giraffe was the ringleader in the breakout. The giraffe apparently kicked open a pen containing the animals and allowed them to make their bid for freedom.

Who knew there was so much money in body parts? Apparently Michael Mastromarino, the owner of Biotech Tissue Services did and was running a multi-million dollar conspiracy to steal body parts from corpses. Mastromarino reportedly even stole some "tissue" from the corpse of “Masterpiece Theatre” host Alistair Cooke.

On March 18 Mastromarino pleaded guilty to a charge of enterprise corruption, nine counts of reckless endangerment and four counts of body stealing and other charges. On Friday he was sentenced to 18 to 54 years in prison. Seven funeral home directors and three funeral homes were also involved in this icky plot.

A Michigan man has been charged with two felony assaults, assault and battery and resisting arrest after an incident involving a fork, his mother, a frozen chicken and two other women.

Frederick McKaney, 40, showed up at his mother's house and demanded money from her. When she refused to give her 40 YEAR OLD SON any money, he reportedly stabbed her in the neck with a fork and pedaled off on his bicycle.

Apparently still fuming because his mommy wouldn't give his grown ass any money, McKaney saw two women on the sidewalk talking and allegedly said something nasty to them before hitting one of them on the head with a frozen chicken.

The woman had to go to the hospital for stitches in her head after being hit with the frozen bird. McKaney's mother suffered minor injuries from being stabbed with the fork, but apparently will recover.

In DeLand, Florida, another stupid criminal tried to rob a store by threatening the clerk with a palm frond while saying "Give me 50 dollar, give me 50 dollar." He was also waving around a pair of flip flop sandals.

A customer in the store used a bar stool to force the guy out of the store. Police caught the idiot and he will face armed robbery charges.

On a side note, I was cutting back some Spanish Bayonet Yucca in my yard this weekend and if those palm fronds are anything like that, then they are no joking matter. I got stabbed multiple times accidentally and as you can imagine, it felt NOT GOOD. The leaves off of that plant could very well be a deadly weapon - but I'm not planning on robbing a store for "50 dollar."